First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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