I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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