party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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