I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
