It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize