it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
