whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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