You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
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i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
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I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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