i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
