Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
