so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
