Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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