So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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