I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize