White coat. Heels.
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
