you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
me + whiskey = a bad person
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You ruined the universe
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize
