Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize