its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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