I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
