lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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