But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
