the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I think we might need a safe word for this...
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
