i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
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I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
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I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?