hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found puke in my bra..
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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