Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize