FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
