I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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