the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
