sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
