Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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