we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
