...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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