I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize