My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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