I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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