My first STD was from a foam party
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize