It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize