I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
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The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
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And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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