She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
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All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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