Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
