I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
