We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
