Me too!
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
