I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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