I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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