When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
