PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
