Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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