Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
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