Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
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after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
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Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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