yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
