i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
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Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
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Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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